Political Peppers, Onions and Cukes!

Various errands took me 10 blocks up Broadway, rather than my usual 10 blocks down Broadway, and I stopped for vegetables at a stand familiar to me. But the usual Hispanic young man was not there. A handsome young Middle Eastern youth stood there, quite friendly looking.

“Hello!” I greeted him, “how are you?”

“God is good” he replied with a smile. His ethnic looks, accent, and Marlboros led me to believe his god is Allah. Ok.

I picked up some bananas, “4 for $1”, some big red peppers and cukes. Then onions. He knew the price of everything but his English was very limited.

“Do you have carrots?”

With a bewildered look he replied, “I’m sorry, I don’t understand much English”. Ok.

He collected my peppers, onions, bananas, and cucumbers and gave me the total, “$8.75. One more banana?” He asked, to make it an even $9.00.

Sure! Then I had to ask,

“Where are you from?”

“I am from Turkey!”, he said with a smile.

After a slight heart cringe I asked, “What do you think of your president Erdogan?”

“He is good I think”.

“Well, you should tell him to treat Armenians better.”

The same bewildered look came upon him, “I’m sorry, I don’t understand…”

“That’s ok”, and I knew in the Lord that it was. I handed over the $9.00.

I took my bags and raised up my hand, saying the few Turkish words I know.

The young man’s face beamed with a smile, and he gave a high two thumbs up!

I called him friend.

The Winning Word!

I’ve been a word lover probably my whole life – there are so many to express thoughts, concepts, and ideas! How extraordinary I say, that God, Maker of Heaven and earth, chose to express Himself through words, His precious word.

This week I found an enjoyable, if not downright addictive, pastime – online Scrabble! And I’m a big winner, 80% of the time, against my opponent the computer. Words galore!

Also this week was my scheduled presentation to an online women’s Bible study. Although a newcomer to this group, the leader had read some of my posts and asked me to speak. My heart sensed an answer to my prayers to serve the Lord and minister to others. I hardly knew the women of this Zoom study, many are in different states. But after much prayer, I was sure of the message that the Lord called me to present.

Of course, when called in any capacity, the devil will move in to rob of confidence with anxious thoughts. “Yes, you’re all ready, but for sure your internet connection will fail midway!” “Your computer is 10 years old, doesn’t it often freeze, especially during Zoom meetings?” All these things have happened of course. Well, I realized, with the meeting the day after tomorrow I’m certainly not going computer shopping. Zoom by phone is just as good, no? Other darting thoughts arose.

The next morning I accompanied my husband Bob for his routine surgical procedure. While waiting to prep, I continued my online Scrabble game, this time losing! Bob noticed.

“Let me see it” I don’t think of Bob as a word connessuer or Scrabble pro but I handed him my phone.

“I see a great word!” Just then the nurse called him in. He handed me the phone and said, “Put L A X right here. It spells RELAX!” With that he left.

I had totally missed that! Yes, RELAX, and with triple letter came to 28 points!!

While admittedly competitive, the winning word pressed more into my heart than on the game board. God often uses husbands to speak to their wives and these letters clicked together my soul, washing over me.

‘Relax’ may not be in the Bible but I truly want to remember it. Because if we believe and trust, if we rest in Him, our hearts can surely relax because God has everything under control.

(And yesterday’s Bible study presentation was such a rewarding fellowship!)

Another Sparrow Falls to the Ground…

I set out early this morning as the temperature is expected to rise above 90°.  Five blocks to the bank, 10 to the grocery store, I prayed as I walked, discussing with the Lord the useless anxiety that often overshadows me.  I meditated upon Jesus’ oft admonishment, “Do not be afraid” (or anxious!) and His reference to the sparrows, “…not one of them will fall to the ground apart from the will of your Father.”  I started to wonder, where are these fallen sparrows, I never see them.  Where do they go to die?  I concluded that, like many suffering animals, they sequester to die alone.  But according to our Lord, our Father knows exactly where each one is, none even fall “apart from His will”.   

Returning from FoodTown I passed my street, pushing myself to go farther to the vegetable stand.  Carrying three bags and toting a stuffed backpack, I pressed on for iceberg lettuce.  Then I saw him on the sidewalk.  A tiny sparrow, not moving as I neared him.  Not budging when a blaring ambulance sped by.  Something’s wrong!

I stooped down to pet it, it did not move or flinch.  Not good.  He had no resistance as I picked him up.  People paused to look as I quickly pondered: What should I do?… I can’t leave him here…I’m carrying too much to bring him anywhere….

Just then a chubby, affable Hispanic women stopped and stooped down with me.  She scooped up the bird and concluded as I did that the poor babe was somehow injured.  She held him so naturally and calmly, like she did it everyday!  

“I’ll take him home and care for him…”

“You will?!?  Thank you!  I couldn’t leave him here…”

She smiled and stroked the bird gently, “I was raised on a farm, I used to take care of baby chicks…”

Wow, did God bring the right person down this sidewalk!

I should have asked her name.  I shared with her about The Bird Fund, a free bird clinic on Columbus Avenue.  She took the info and said, “I’m sure my daughter can bring him there.”

As we walked together for two blocks.  I thought she lived nearby but went to the bus stop, “I live in the Bronx” she said.  And she’s carrying a baby bird in her hand all the way? 

So, according to the Lord, our Father saw that sparrow fall, it was His will.  For sure that babe had anxiety, unable to fly or move on a busy city sidewalk.  He didn’t know what we should all know, our Father has everything under control.  

“I was raised on a farm….cared for chicks…I’ll take him home”

“Don’t be afraid; you are worth more than many sparrows”. 

Fathers – What They Really Need

Father’s Day is somewhat complicated today. Gone is the simple joy of picking out the new tie, cozy slippers, or warm sweater. Our culture of confused gender roles and sexual identities disparages traditional role of fathers. Single parenting and strained marriages often make stressed parents.

So what do fathers really need?

More than ever fathers – our sons, brothers, and husbands – need the undergirding strength of fervent prayer.

My parents, ages 90 and 92, visited the grave of their only son who tragically died years ago.  At 38, my brother Paul was a strong believer, heartbroken to leave his young family but spiritually ready to meet the Lord.  Not so my beloved parents who stand grieving without hope of seeing their son nor eternal life unless they repent and receive salvation.  

Father’s Day is June 19th.  In anticipation, perhaps as a community of readers, writers, and believers can we commit to pray starting Sunday June 12th for fathers and would be fathers – sons, husbands, and brothers?  May they rise up to know the Lord, pursue righteousness, and take authority in their homes as spiritual leaders, lovingingly drawing their family to Christ.  Will you join me?  

The older I get the more I like lists…perhaps you will also make a list of those you will vie for, beseeching our Father in heaven to intervene.  May they find and fulfill the call of God upon their lives and know eternal hope at their jouney’s end.

Let’s give fathers what they really need.  

NYPD: Missing Man Formation

Almost everyone grieves the loss of these two outstanding young men, dedicated to public service, ambushed and killed by a treacherous reprobate. To honor their service and sacrifice, I would encourage those who missed the services to view the funerals online for Detectives Jason Rivera and Wilbert Mora, promoted posthumously.

Prior to my retirement from State Parole, I covered the Harlem precincts, including the 32 precinct, for nearly 30 years. We often worked alongside NYPD during investigations, executing warrants and making arrests. On my own, I averaged about 20 homevisits a week in Harlem, checking on curfews, parolee status, community and family complaints, and general assistance to releasees. That’s about 1,000 home visits a year. While there were some hairy moments, I was never afraid, never wanted to leave the Harlem community for ‘easier’ precincts or positions.

That was then.

Just a week before these shootings I wondered, How to Live in a Reprobate City, noting the dilution of criminal offenses by newly elected D.A. Bragg. The deaths of Detectives Rivera and Mora now mark the fourth and fifth shootings of NYPD officers in January alone seem a grim launch into 2022.

We don’t have a ‘gun problem’, as some politicians would sum it. We have a serious violence problem, morality problem, and sin problem which is reaping the dark and tragic fruits of lawlessness.

As Detective’s Mora’s casket left St. Patrick’s Cathedral, the skies held a traditional sad tribute – a Missing Man Formation. In honor of a lost one of valor, planes or helicopters fly overhead in formation, then one will depart.

Today, helicopters flew in Missing Man Formation to honor Det Wilbert Mora,

Mora missing man formation

While both Detectives Rivera and Mora are a tremendous loss to our community, there is, I fear, one even greater.

The incremental annihilation of God’s laws, God’s ways, and God’s decrees is leaving us to the destructive ways of human nature. We have boldly rejected God and elect men and women to establish this anarchy.

There is a colossal Missing Man Formation flying overhead everyday. His absence and departure, His abandonment in judgment, will culminate into the worst lament of mankind.

May we, who know God, seek Him everyday, call upon Him everyday, walk with Him everyday and however He wills, may we boldly represent God and His salvation through Jesus Christ alone. He may be a ‘Missing Man’ to those around us – let us be a light that He may be seen.

How to Live in a Reprobate City

Wait, can a city be reprobate? Or are only individuals given over by God to a reprobate mind…”given over” as a convicted prisoner is given over for sentencing? I believe that both assertions are true as individual corrupt minds promote and elect the leadership that will govern over them. Collectively, there is a ‘reprobate mind’, set against God, against His commandments – preparing to receive the “wages of sin”.

NYC’s flashpoints of sin are almost forgotten but not by God. The culmination of ‘Gay Pride’, landmark celebratory parades and festivities continue to resound and replicate around the globe. ‘Abortion up to delivery’, legislation effective January 2019, had to repeal several penal laws to allow the murder of viable babies even as they are pushing through the womb. This great victory was celebrated at the State Capital but most notably in NYC as elected officials clapped and cheered before cameras and the city was lit up in triumphant celebration for the world to see.

The Empire State Building, set aglow to celebrate this infanticide, was not struck by lightening. No tsunami washed over the city. Instead, I believe, God silently yet powerfully effected an abandonment of this city. He is still here, of course, and faithful to the brethren, but is allowing rebellious unrestrained expression bring about unrestrained consequences of sin. God has given us over to a reprobate mind.

A year after the murderous abortion celebration came ‘Bail Reform’ 2020, delighting ‘progressives’ and igniting freed detainees. The great lie of Satan, “you can sin and nothing will happen!” was planted in the NYC judicial system, just prior to, just in time for, the riots of George Floyd. Criminals are freed, instigated, and emboldened toward utter lawlessness while police, set upon and degraded, retire, quit and transfer in record numbers.

Crime and lawlessness rule once again in this city but with great difference – it is facilitated by the leadership. In fact, according to the newly elected Manhattan District Attorney, crime is no longer crime in this city.

“Bragg has sparked a firestorm after announcing that his office will no longer prosecute a variety of crimes, from resisting arrest to drug dealing. He has also laid out a plan that lowers the type of crimes that armed robbers, for example, can be charged with by reducing the charges to lesser counts. What has been considered felonies would be cut to misdemeanors, which would often mean no jail time for offenders.” (from Fox News report, 1/12/2022)

One need not be a retired law enforcement to conclude that consequences are powerful influencers of behavioral change. However, after supervising felony offenders for nearly 30 years I must say that no other factor affects decisions more than considering sure and exact consequences. Hollow threats are laughable but real consequences, punishment for crimes, can stir rational thinking and change behavior.

How is one to live for Christ in a ‘reprobate city’? Are we to live in a reprobate city?

The answer to the latter is, of course, and surely, what springs forth from the cities will cast seeds into the nation. The apostle Peter exhorts us, “prepare your minds for action”, having our mindset toward holiness and unto the Lord. If we walk aright before the Lord, we can know the confidence and power of walking in His favor and faithfulness wherever He calls us to live.

The greatest temptation for those striving to live a righteous life is to fight against the ‘unrighteous’, to hammer shameless leaders and their supporters. However passionate and logical, it is not God’s way.

“For our wrestling is not against flesh and blood, but against the principalities, against the powers, against the world-rulers of this darkness…” Fighting a political party is easier, even rewarding to the flesh. But as Lloyd Martyn-Jones expounds in The Christian Warfare,

“The term “world rulers”…is a very powerful word which conjures up the notion of power to govern and to rule the whole world.”

Martyn-Jones also states in this captivating book,

“There are unseen “rulers” who are manipulating world affairs…”

“They are manipulating the Press and all other such agencies…”

“There is nothing more monstrous than that people should joke about the devil…”

So how to live for Christ when the heart of the city is reprobate and the majority celebrate it?

While the whole world lies in darkness and is ripening to receive the antichrist, as believers (I remind myself!) we’re not called to fight fallen man. They are already under the wrath of God, should we defeat them to preserve ‘our way of life’ which is destined to conform to the antichrist? Surely this is a devilish snare set to derail us from the high call of God.

“You are the light of the world” proclaimed Jesus about His followers. I pray to be a light in this dark world, obedient to Him, available to Him, humbled under His word. My flesh would rather fight but my heart knows it’s all futile and worse, what purposes of God will I miss by following carnal fervor?

I believe God has us living amongst reprobate minds for two reasons. One, to draw nearer to Him through prayer and His word, becoming more dependent upon the Him and ultimately to conform to the image of His Son. Secondly, there are people in the darkness, those whom the Lord would call out. Representing Him in the short time we have left in this world, may God reveal them, enable us to minister to them, counsel them in the truth and draw them into the Kingdom of God.

May the Lord embolden and brighten His life and light in us, order our steps, and call His sheep from within the ‘reprobate city’ – wherever it is.

Walk by the Spirit, Not by Sight

As I approached the mailboxes yesterday afternoon, there was Margarita*, one of my neighbors, opening up her ConEdison bill as I reached for my mail. Although Spanish speaking, she needed no words to express her angst as she tipped the paper toward me so I could read, FINAL DISCONNECT NOTICE. It seemed clear that she hadn’t paid her bill for at least a year. In our heat-included small apartments, gas and electric bills are fairly small. Margarita works, how could she let this happen?

I immediately sensed something was wrong, other than this big debt. Her countenance and affect seemed disoriented and she stumbled over simple questions I asked. So I urged her, “Call them, Margarita, you have to pay something soon, even $50, to prevent this turn off!”. Is she depressed? Having mental health issues? Admittedly we don’t know her that well.

Something was churning within me. Although Bob and I are quick to help neighbors in need, I felt a strong restraint here. My emotional response, moreover Christian response, is to help. But I know our emotions are fleshly and it is the Spirit that applies the scriptural call in every situation. Although we have on occasion helped Margarita, here, I was disturbed and restrained.

We walked up the stairway in silence. She probably expected some financial help and part of me questioned, “what kind of neighbor am I? She’ll be in the dark within a month!” Some people describe a ‘check in their spirit’, but I had a grip in my spirit and had to submit. I prayed and explained the whole situation to Bob, knowing that leadership comes from the husband. He did not sense the Lord’s leading to give. “There’s something wrong here Bob, I can’t pinpoint it but it’s bigger than the ConEdison bill.” I prayed about it and tabled the subject to the next morning.

I was still unsettled in the morning but after praying, I headed down to her apartment. At least I could call ConEd, perhaps make a minimal payment, or clarify her options. I knocked on her door. Then knocked again. Finally I heard a shuffling and she opened the door just a crack, then a bit wider where I could see in full view an altar of witchcraft. The depths of Santeria, beckoning demons with incantations and ritual, contaminate the soul and almost always bring about a mimicry of mental illness.

Margarita now acted paranoid. She gave me the bill, keeping the door cracked, and I said I’d call and try to help. After calling and clarifying I returned with the conclusion: Margarita herself, or her grown son, must call to discuss even a minimal payment, she has until January to do this.

The churning in my heart was relieved, realizing that the Lord was restraining me. Jesus did not always heal everyone, did not always feed everyone, neither did He meet every need but did only His Father’s will. It is not always God’s will to intervene in every way, especially if recipients give the thanks and praise upon a table of witchcraft. I have seen enough Santeria and Espiritismo to know how powerfully it corrupts a person inwardly and outwardly, always bearing ugly fruits.

Perhaps the Lord will lead us to speak the truth to Margarita, but only He can draw our hearts and prepare hers to hear the word. We will continue to pray for her. Will her lights go out? Will she lose her mind? Only God knows but for sure, if she calls upon Him with a repentant and contrite heart, He will come in with true light and deliver her from evil.

When the Devil Speaks…

do we listen? Of course not – or do we?

Believe it or not, I’ve always loved the NYC subway system, grateful to ride on the world’s largest system, traveling great distance for a small fare. However, flagrant lawlessness and random violence compels me now to only ride city buses. Of course, any trip is twice as long but it’s safer, right?

Half way home on a recent bus ride a woman boarded and immediately broke the peace of all therein. Although she was well dressed, there was a rage in her countenance and with it she verbally dominated the bus. An African American, she spewed out racial and personal slurs with bellowing volume, never pausing. She paced through the bus and targeted nearly everyone. I pretended to read as I gauged the scene – everyone was cowering, grown men were gripped to their seats. If this woman physically lashed out to any vulnerable person, would anyone assist? Could I bum rush her?

Her cutting and humiliating taunts were personal as she pointed to total strangers jeering and ridiculing their unseen weakness and vulnerability. When she got to me, she announced, “I SEE YOU!!” and spewed out a very personal thing that would embarrass and humiliate me.

No doubt she was demonic and a bum rush would be utterly futile against such spiritual power! Her devilish assignment completed, she finally exited – the whole bus exhaled in relief.

While I let those biting words deflate my heart, assuredly that is not the devil’s worst maneuver or assault. While the “whole world is a prisoner of sin”, Satan’s sole target are those freed from this prison through the blood of Christ. His powers are deployed personally, secretly and cunningly, fashioned and honed with capacities beyond our human purview.

One appalling evidence of apostasy found in entire churches, pulpits, ministries and thereby hearts of believers themselves is the blindness and disregard of the powers of darkness. Derailed from godly commission, retired from the fight, most churches no longer contend for the honor of God nor for the true salvation of man, they are so entrenched in worldliness, the devil need not attack them at all!

To dismiss and diminish the ‘powers that rule this world’ brings success to the devil’s wiles. They are world powers and they are personal powers. As the people of God, as the Body of Christ, we often fail to acknowledge the kingdom in which we now live. We are the outsiders and, to walk close to our Lord, we must maintain that separation.

To a great extent, most believers are comfortable in this Kingdom and work to maintain that comfort and fit. While they become ‘spiritual’ during crisis or illness, most ‘Christians’ are content with worldly wisdom, motivational sermons, and overused spiritual clichés, powerless mantras. The ‘powers of darkness’ are nearly obsolete to many professed believers.

We can’t expect Satan to announce himself on a bus – if only he would be so obvious and exposed! We must walk in the Spirit to discern the diverse ways he speaks into our lives to bring chaos, discord, discouragement, and depression – to rob us of our peace. If possible, he will frame every circumstance that comes upon us with an understanding that is separate and apart from God and His unchanging word. (I wholeheartedly recommend Martyn Lloyd Jones’, The Christian Warfare where expounds upon these life giving truths of God)

Contending in Satan’s kingdom, to make this world a ‘better place’, is an alluring substitute for God’s unchanging purpose and fight: to deploy us into the spiritual battle to free men from the clutches of this world, reconciling them unto God for His coming Kingdom.

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Patient and stealth, Satan intervenes in a plethora of schemes and allurements to derail us from God’s plan for our lives. Once off track, we are left with artificial fruit. Whatever short time remains for us, I pray to be diligent and discerning. May we recognize the craftiness and deceit of the enemy who speaks through many venues. May we stay in the battle and fulfill every call and purpose of God for His glory!

Lord, Raise Up Nathans!

The greatest cultural tragedy of our time is not political corruption, immigration crisis, abortion fervor or economic downfalls. From heaven’s view, church apostasy, carnality and compromise are what grieves God’s heart.

Does a church, a group of believers, start out apostate? Do they first gather together as a kernel of faith with compromise in their hearts? Nearly every overgrown church and ministry once began with a group of sincere believers, perhaps in someone’s home, even gathering to worship in a garage. Leadership emerges, spiritual momentum grows, and bigger venues are sought – all with prayer and longing for God’s Kingdom.

So what happens? How do sincere believers morph into a mega-church and become apostate and worldly? How do esteemed pastors, whom I have learned from in the past, swerve into compromise, questioning or diluting the Biblical tenets such as creation, truths of the end times, and the established protocols for God’s people? How do they pivot away from holiness and aspire to worldly success and acclaim?

Nearly always, the light of Christ exponentially dims as the church grows with wealth, popularity and cultural/political influence. Knowingly or not, the worldly design of success, wealth, celebrity status and world status slowly takes root – opposite to God’s design of growing deeper in humility, sacrifice, and separation from the world.

One central fault of design predicating compromise is the utter esteem of one leader, rather than a plural leadership of elders as described by Paul. It is often a predictable pattern now, always bringing disillusionment and, at its fruition, painful heartbreak with ministries implode.

The pattern seems thus: a gifted leader becomes the central focus of church success and so to maintain the ‘church success’ of popularity, wealth, public image and proliferation, the inner circle spins or covers up indiscretions and sin. They surround themselves with ‘yes men’ just as the world would.

Q: Where would David have ended up without Nathan? Without the conviction of Nathan, who bravely rebuked this king, David would have fallen into the worst judgment known to man – God would have turned him over to his sin. Without conviction, without godly sorrow, comes hardness of heart and justification of sin. A ‘Nathan’ is a great gift from God – unafraid to convict of sin and compromise (personal notes from my Bible, source unknown)

It is deeply painful to love and serve in a profound ministry and watch it implode however, hindsight reveals that God leaks and uncovers sin and opens the eyes of those who will see. “Leakage” is a concept in law enforcement investigations – referring to leads and clues from criminal behavior that can reveal the truth. There is leakage pulpits as well.

When ‘Nathans’ rise up too late, their voice is diminished and they are often expelled from the circle of influence as there is so much to lose. And the church will then spin a story about why they left.

Although several ministries come to mind, and I rarely mention names, I will say that the ‘cover-up’ in John MacArthur’s church regarding his COVID illness and others in the church is very telling. It is leakage for any who care to see. Other leakage would be his assertion that ‘those who take the mark of the beast can still be saved’ – utterly contrary to scripture. While he rightly points out apostate doctrines and erroneous leaders, he wrongly often ridicules them, leading his congregation to laugh when they should really be crying.

Where are the Nathans to rise up, when leaders’ hearts are still tender and fearfully bent toward God?

As part of Christ’s body, we are all called to more than being fed God’s word. He installs gifts in each of us, that we may rise up and live out scripture – the “living and active, sharper than any two edged sword” word of God. Do we believe it is, ‘God breathed and useful for teaching, rebuking and correcting’?

‘Nathans’ may fail to rise up, squelching the conviction in their heart. Or, they may be expelled from the church when they do. But without scriptural and godly rebuke, roots of compromise and carnality will seep into every aspect of the church or ministry and the end result, even if the ministry stands, will be Ichabod.

“You are the man!” Words of conviction yet of great love, as God chastises those He loves, those He calls His own.

Oh Lord, stir our hearts with Your purposes, and raise up the hearts of Nathans in your congregations, rebuke us, humble us. Let us aspire to holiness, not success, that others may see the Lord.

Who Wants to Read About Humility?

I had Andrew Murray’s book, ‘Humility’, on my shelf for sometime. I probably looked through it once but never prayerfully, seeking what the Lord may have for me through this godly brother. There are less than 100 pages to this book but beware, every sentence holds godly truth. Murray begins his weighty discourse describing humility as most essential yet most neglected to our salvation:

…(our) whole relation to God and man marked by an all-pervading humility. Without this, there can be no true abiding in God’s presence or experience of His favor and the power of His Spirit…Humility is not so much a grace or virtue along with others: it is the root of all…”

He asserts that he himself, along with many Christians, “had long known the Lord without realizing that meekness and lowliness of heart are to be the distinguishing feature of the disciple, as they were of the Master.”

Such “distinguishing feature” is hardly evident in the church today…is it at all evident in me?

While written in 1896, Murray aptly describes the Body of Christ today, striving for and rejoicing in “manly virtues, such as boldness, joy, contempt of the world, zeal, self-sacrifice” while the “deeper graces” taught by Jesus, “most distinctly connected with His cross and the death of self – poverty of spirit, meekness, humility, lowliness – are scarecly thought of or valued”.

God may give boldness to the weak and timid while they live out His call but boldness alone is not esteemed by God. He does not “exalt” the bold but the humble. In fact, God declared, “This is the one esteem: he who is humble and contrite in spirit, and trembles at My word.” (Isaiah 66:2)

If it is at all possible to make humility exciting, Andrew Murray does it. Humility – the way of victory, of entering God’s presence, the way God exalts us – the way of the cross!

Like all aspects of the Christian life, humility is not merely something to agree with but is essential in our walk and surrender to our Savior. “The highest lesson a believer has to learn is humility” and I think I’m just in Humility 101.

“Take every opportunity of humbling yourself before God and man…Accept with gratitude everything that God allows from within or without, from friend or enemy, in nature or in grace to remind you of your need of humbling and to help you to it.”

Yesterday, the morning after I finished this book, my husband Bob did something thoughtless, (ok, unintentional) that irks me very much, as though it could totally discombobulate my day. The fact that he’s done it several times before raises the temp. Murray’s exhortations of humility, verbatim, rose up in my heart but I resisted them, lecturing and blaming Bob, following his steps out as he left for work. I left for the laundry room.

As I stuffed the clothes in the machines, my heart was gripped and convicted. I repented before the Lord and called Bob right away and apologized, truly from my heart. He was very sorry too – just a mutual binding together of sorry hearts that ended up uplifting the morning!

“Accept every humiliation; look upon fellow man who tries or vexes you as a means of grace to humble you.”

Just today, as I was writing this, a situation arose through a phone call with someone who “tries and vexes me”. I actually prayed, “Lord, convict her heart in this situation.” But within an hour, the Lord showed me, clearly, that I was wrong in the scenario. I had to point that out to her and apologize. And, I had to thank God for these opportunities, exposing my uprisen flesh and the lack of this godly virtue.

Murray points to Paul who earnestly asked the Lord to remove the ‘thorn’ that humbled him. Like the Apostle Paul, virtually all Christians want to pursue humility but in truth want to avoid all that humbles. But, Murray concludes, “Our humiliations lead us, in the experience of the presence and power of Jesus, to choose humility as our highest blessing.”

My husband and I are earnestly praying to know God’s call and to serve Him in these, our senior years. In response to that prayer, the Lord is revealing what is really lacking – and what is truly needed. Of course, writing all this is somewhat humiliating – don’t expect follow-up posts!

“God exalts the humble”. In the meantime, I hope to stay teachable, even if it is Humility 101. I know that the Teacher has a great interest in my passing and, as I keep returning to class, He will never fail me.

Who wants to read about humility? Who wants, really wants, to be humble? I hope it’s me!

Humility